When our life changes, we may struggle to adjust to the change, whether it be a good one or a challenging one.
Others in our life may struggle more than we do.
For instance, we may earn a promotion at work and believe others in our life will be so happy for us. Our promotion may hit them at a time when they can’t keep up at work so worry about losing their job. Our win stings because they look at loss.
We may be the primary family caregiver for our parent. When our siblings visit, they look like deer in headlights, uncomfortable on the couch as they observe our parent in decline. You do it all while they just sit wide-eyed.
In both situations, we may be tempted to judge and then distance ourselves. What if we simply acknowledge their struggle and give space rather than distance. With space, we allow them time to process. We also give ourselves space for what we need, whether that be a celebration or quiet time with tears.
We also give our relationship an opportunity to shift without the relationship ending. We can take a break without making it a permanent closure. Because sometimes another will come back to us after they have processed the situation to be present for us in supportive, comforting ways. We can stay open to that possibility while also focusing on meeting our own needs.
We can remind ourselves that space can be the right solution during unsettling situations by asking ourselves this question to start our day: “When can I give space?”
When has space rather than distance worked for you?
Resources
The Sunday Question, Volume 3, is now available. Use our 53-question book to create a comforting, intentional ritual.
Enjoy the podcast below.
